During the month of Elul HaShem comes to meet us, He says return to who you truly are, to the pure soul that I created you to be. For most of us that is the hardest part, stripping away all the layers that we have surrounded ourselves with. These layers can take many forms but the end result is the same, they all take us farther and farther away from G*D. Repentance can only come from the realization that the spiritual separation one feels when removed from G*D's presence is a reality to painful to bear.
There is a fascinating insight from Rabbi David Aaron, which is based on the teaching of Sifri. It is the idea that HaShem has faith in us. In the Modeh Ani prayer that we say immediately upon awakening in the morning we say a prayer of thanksgiving for the return of our neshamah-our soul.
"I am grateful before You, O Living and Eternal Sovereign, for You have returned my soul within me with compassion-great is Your faith"
In essence we are thanking our Creator for having faith in us! We must realize that if HaShem has returned our neshamah to our body this morning He is telling us that our sacred mission on this earth is not yet finished, and that He has faith in our ability to fulfill this mission. He knows us better than we know ourselves. He knows our challenges, He knows our weaknesses, yet He has faith in our ability to overcome these challanges. We must in turn emulate Him and have faith in ourselves
This teaching took me back to a time when during a meditation I had a revelation that I was the daughter of The King. Every time I go back to that place I get the same feeling of awe and humility. To what do I owe this great honor, and how can I possibly live up to the obligations that this status brings? It is only through the love and mercy of HaShem beloved, it is only His belief in me that I can believe in myself.
The Midrash Shocher Tov explains the verse in Tehilim, "Lamnatzeach al shoshanim livnei Korach,"The sons of Korach said,"We are the roses" with a parable. A king once came to visit his people. They desired to give him a crown of gold adorned with stones. The king's entourage said to the townspeople, "The king does not want a golden crown. Are there roses?" The townspeople happily gave him roses. Similarly, HaShem says He does not want gifts of gold or silver. All He desires are roses.
The Sifsei Tzadik writes that roses represent softness. Gold and silver are rough and hard. HaShem does not want a hard heart. He desires a crown of roses signifying a heart filled with love, gentleness, and beauty. HaShem says, when you have this quality of the rose, then I can be "The shepherd among the roses," I can lead you to repentance. Beloved all we need to do is strip everything away and simply come, come before the King with a broken and open heart, it is HaShem who does the work all we need to do is Shema and follow.
One of the many ways that HaShem leads us is through His creation. Through the wonders of His creation He shows us everyday how much we are loved, in the song of a bird, the sweet smell of a rose, in the new moon as it hangs close enough to touch, large and low on the horizon as if to say yes you too can start again. In our service to HaShem we must never lose that freshness, that newness, that sense of awe and wonder. If one can just open one's heart and perceive it the whole universe and all that is in it declare His majesty.
HaShem
also leads us through His Torah, it reveals His very character. It is a
love letter, it is our guidebook to life from Him to us. Rabbi Schneur
Zalman of Liadi the first Lubovitcher Rebbe, also known as the Alter
Rebbe said, "Elul's unique power is that the Thirteen Attributes
of Divine Compassion radiate through it, even when we are immersed in
the mundane activities of the week". May we all take advantage of the
fact that the King is in the field. Shed the chains that bind and run
to Him, He is waiting beloved.........
~Elisheva Amaris
~Elisheva Amaris
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